In a new advertising campaign by Family and Community Services NSW,

A very young adopted child is presented to viewers through only the perspective of her adoptive parents. Entitled ‘A Perfect Match’, the ad’s language harks back to past practices when babies and children were ‘matched’ to their adopters, and when adoption was sold as the ‘one size fits all’ solution to social problems of poverty, single motherhood, the ‘unwanted’ child, illegitimacy and infertility, in one fell swoop. In this ad, the adopted child’s adoptive parents ‘talk about’ her – she is too young to grasp the intent of the advertisement. Her adoptive mother says the little girl has ‘completed me’ and again, the notion that the grief of infertility is resolved by adopting someone else’s baby harks back to past narratives and false claims that adoption completes life for people who are unable to have their own children.

Elizabeth Russell

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The majority of adopters are infertile and infertility is considered to be a trauma and professionals now recommend that before one takes a major decision such as bringing an alien child into the home the potential adopters work through any grief issues they have about the loss of not being able to have their own biological child.

If the grief and other psychological phenomena that attach to infertility are not dealt with prior to adoption it can set the adoption up to fail.

Additionally unexpressed or repressed grief may be displaced as an overwhelming need to adopt and this of itself can cloud judgement. Once a couple have adopted they then have a vested interest in justifying to themselves and others that what they have done is ‘good and moral’….Apology Alliance


So her entire ancestry and identity had to be obliterated so she could get care? How is that still happening in this day and age? If she has siblings she is not related to them anymore! And now has genetic strangers named as having given birth to her!

Sharyn white



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